Today we are pleased to share a guest blog from Rae Luskin who is hosting The Creative Activist Retreat here at Catalyst Ranch on Friday, Sept. 25, 2015.
“Resistance by definition is self-sabotage.”
I was a talented writer, with a passion to help people live their best lives.
I set out to write my memoir, The Odyssey of Healing: from Survivor to Thriver to share my personal story of healing from sexual abuse. I started really strong, filling pages with vignettes, my personal art work, stories of healing using different modalities that made me want to cry, laugh and touched my soul with warm inspiration.
After it was complete I took it to some leaders in personal development and asked for feedback. They were kind and read it and said it needs more, your story is not enough… include other peoples.’ Disappointed but determined I returned home and wrote an eleven page questionnaire. I sent it to several people I felt were thriving as well as my current therapist. In all I collected 150 interviews and hand tabulated them with little hash marks. They confirmed my theory that creativity, spirituality, forgiveness and body work were key elements in healing.
That is when the voices kicked in.
“Why would anyone listen to me? What do I have to really contribute that is new and original? I can’t do this. I am not good enough. Someone else will do it better.”
Recognizing this as the voice of resistance I had a scoop of rocky road ice cream, took a deep breath and started writing the introduction again. The next day I woke up early, showered, walked the dog, sat back down with a cup of tea to write and realized I had to call mom, I couldn’t possibly work with this pile of papers on my desk and the laundry still waiting to be folded. Two hours later after lunch I just had to add this brilliant photo I took on my phone to my Facebook page. Before I knew it, it was 5 pm; all I had to show for my day was a basket of folded clothes and 10 likes on my Facebook page.
Time for some television and the promise to get it done tomorrow.
Does this sound familiar?
Resistance gets the best of us…if we let it. Those little slips can turn into full on self-sabotage. This is what happened to me many years ago and that book never got written…but I learned from my mistakes and have just published my second book, The Creative Activist: Make the World Better, One Person, One Action at a Time.
Do you have a big dream? Do you have a desire to make the world better but you seem to get sidetracked? In order to eliminate resistance and self-sabotage patterns from our lives we must first make an effort to be aware or our actions and behaviors.
- Take time for self-reflection. Only through self-reflection will you gain the necessary insight, perspective and understanding to begin the process of transformation.
- Ask better questions. Asking “how” and “what” questions can help us overcome obstacles and challenges. How can I do this better or smarter? What have I learned from this experience? What about this can make me stronger? How will changing my response help me get to where I want to be?
- Be kind to yourself. If you are anything like me you love to beat up on yourself. You say things to yourself you would never say to a friend. So when that happens take a deep breath and say okay…next time I will do it better. Imagine what your best friend would say to you.
- Develop a support team that has a fail forward mentality. In other words they do not recognize failure as limiting but as information and feedback.
- Focus on creative solutions not problems. Try and think outside the box, looking at unorthodox strategies that might seem out of your comfort zone. They will help you expand possibilities and grow in unexpected ways.
- Think bigger and create a bolder vision that inspires you and keeps you motivated. Write it down and follow up with a vision board.
- Take more risks. In the 1992 movie Defending Your Life, Albert Brooks must prove his worth in the afterlife through how he has demonstrated courage. How have you demonstrated courage? When was the last time you stepped out of your comfort zone?
Where is resistance showing up in your life? Please share it below.
Rae Luskin Luskin is the founder of Art and Soul Connections and The Winning Adventure. She has also authored the new book, The Creative Activist: Make the World Better, One Person, One Action at a Time, which is designed to inspire others to make a difference. As a lifelong learner, she has studied with Mary Morrissey, Lisa Nichols, Jack Canfield, Janet and Chris Atwood (certified passion test facilitator), Brendon Bouchard, Steve Harrison and Lisa Sassevich to name a few.
Luskin has been a community activist for more than 40 years and for more than 15-years has been a leader in using creative expression to nurture self-worth, resilience, healing, and social change. Sharing her personal story of child sexual abuse she inspires and motivates people to turn their pain into purpose. A portion of proceeds from book sales and The Creative Activist Retreat will benefit the Northwest Center Against Sexual Assault (Northwest CASA), which provides free services to sexual assault survivors and their loved ones within the North and Northwest suburbs of Cook County, Ill.
To find out more about The Creative Activist Retreat, check out our Happenings page (top right corner of this blog) or at http://blog.catalystranch.com/chicago-happenings/#activist.